Are you using food as a way to deal with your emotions?
If the answer to this is yes, then read on. It doesn’t have to be this way. You may be feeling overweight, be a yo yo dieter or have been told recently by a medical professional or family member that you really need to get control of your weight to have better health. I’m sure you have noticed that you have piled on the pounds, a lot of people did through lockdown but losing it seems to be harder than putting it on. You know why you are getting fatter but you won’t necessarily want to admit that to other people around you and therefore you blame it on being too busy, working in shift patterns, or other people feeding you the wrong stuff. Ultimately you know, you have a choice. A choice of health and caring about yourself. Knowing that you are worth it!
Now if you are really honest with yourself, you probably deep down know what you need to do to lose weight. You may need to exercise more, eat less chocolate or fatty foods, etc. You just can’t be bothered and get motivated as the task of getting slimmer just seems overwhelming.
Why do you turn to food?
- Comfort – to feel happier
- To fill the time
- To fill the empty space in your heart which is unhappy and dissatisfied.
- Unresolved trauma is making you feel bad and you haven’t dealt with it yet
What is trauma and why will it be affecting my eating habits?
Trauma comes in all shapes and sizes. Something which was traumatic to one person, won’t be to another. Trauma can come from your recent past or way back into childhood. We often repress how we feel in different situations but eventually that emotion which is stressing us out must be dealt with. You may be using food as a way to deal with your stress and trauma, which isn’t the right way. Trauma could come from abuse you have experienced with your family/relationships, house fires, murders/rape, deaths of loved ones/pets, accidents and loads more. You have sustained a ‘shock’ and had to find a way to deal with it. This is how post traumatic stress disorder evolves and beds in within you.
Unresolved trauma will be bringing up emotions such as anger, fear, shame, anxiety, guilt, frustration, loneliness and a general feeling of being unloved and unworthy. You eat to deal with the feelings. You are also more likely not to look after yourself and love yourself enough to put good quality food and drink inside you or to make the effort to exercise. Eating good foods such as fruit and vegetables, moving your body and hydrating it with water are key ways to losing weight.
So why won’t I care for myself?
It doesn’t make sense does it? You don’t like the weight you are carrying but you aren’t making any effort to shed the weight or to look after yourself, even though you know what to do. You are intelligent enough to know that you need to eat better – more fruit and vegetables and to know that you must exercise more. You are basically procrastinating.
This is a sign of trauma, whether you realise it or not. The bottom line is that you need some trauma release therapy such as Reiki, The Balance Procedure, Neuro Linguistic Programming, Emotional Freedom Technique or EMDR to deal with it. The lower level counselling/CBT modalities and talking therapies won’t really advance you enough. They are a good starting point though if you can’t afford the other methods privately.
So what do I need to do now to get started?
Start changing small things in your diet and exercise plan and make new habits. Habits take at least 28 times to embed as an unconscious habit, so you have to keep going if you are changing things. Only try to embed a maximum of five habits at one time over a monthly period. You are going for sustained change not a quick fix. Track the habits you are changing on a sheet of paper over 28 days to make sure that you properly fix it into your routine.
Here are some examples of habits you can embed:
- Drink a glass of hot water and a slice of lemon as you wake up as this will hydrate you
- Meditate on waking up and deliberately send love to yourself and other people in the world
- Write down 5 things to be grateful for about the food you have been able to buy and eat every day
- Drink a glass of water before you eat any meal
- Put your knife and fork down between bites of food and chew and savor and appreciate the taste of what is in your mouth
- Deliberately don’t buy the foods that you know are bad for you
- Plan your shopping by making a list of ingredients needed, before you go shopping. It will be cheaper for you and will help you stay focused on what you need rather than what you want!
- Don’t go shopping when you know you are hungry
- Buy unprocessed food and the best quality you can afford when shopping
This works for other habits too – alcohol, drugs, excessive overspending/shopping etc as well.
If you would like to have some help to shift your unmotivated, procrastinating self into one which starts making incremental changes to love yourself more, then come along on the next Inside Out D.I.E.T. The course is over a six week period and you will be given support to work on your desires, intuition, energy, emotions and the timing of your habits and behaviours. You will also be introduced into working with the Balance Procedure to shift how you are feeling and to feel emotionally more balanced and happy. The overall effect of attending the course is to help you lift both physical and emotional weight. Weight Loss course – The Inside Out D.I.E.T. (insightfulminds.co.uk)